What? Did Yahweh, Allah, Shinto and all the Hindu gods have a big fight or auction to see who got the rights to the only afterlife?

Drat it! cried the other gods, that Yahweh ALWAYS wins!

Now this Yahweh, who'd spent a good deal of time telling the Jews that they were his chosen people, helped them out of bandage into "The promised Land", has washed his hands of them. "My Son started a new religion and now you can all go to Hell"

"Wait a minute" cry the Jews and muslims. "Surely you and our Gods are the same - the only one god? We've just been interpreting You all differently all these years cos some turkeys went and wrote these tomes and we all sucked it all up. Can't we come in too?"

"No!" thunders Yahweh. "For I am a jealous god and ..."
"Nah! you gave that all up after the Old Testememt. Remember? The bits WE read and believed in too?"
"As I was saying, " continues Yahweh, "I've turned my back on all you lot now. Only my Son's followers can get in!"
"What about all that milk and honey stuff?"
"That's just a load of baloney that the Jews wrote, to justify their invading and taking another country for their own"
"So all that 10 commandment stuff that we've all been following - it wasn't You who smote the words into the tablets?"
"No. What do you think Moses was doing in the mountain all those days?"
"What? You mean it wasn't YOUR word"
"I told you. It was men who wrote all that tosh"
"What the hell is the Bible then"
"Ah well ..."
"And the Virgin Birth? You mean that wasn't just some young girl trying to avoid death by stoning for extra-marital sex, by saying that an angel got her up the duff?"
"No, that was true."

A group of chattering Brazilian indians come to the front.

"How about us? We hadn't even heard of You till now. Can we come in too?"
"No. You've been following all that tree spirit and shaman nonsense."

...

Sorry. String of conscience/consciousness