Ken,

Such a beautiful message. Good for you and Judy -- that's true love.

Mike



>Hi Mike,
>
>I may be bold enough to respond but I certainly don't have answers, at least not answers I can put into words. I can only relate my personal experience.
>
>My parents met in 1941, love at first site sort of thing. From Iowa, they eloped to Missouri on the day after my Mom's 20th birthday. I was born in 1943 and my parents celebrated their 50th anniversary in 1991. Mom is gone now but dad is spritely as ever. In fact not too long ago, a store clerk (she may have been all of 16) asked my dad and I if we were brothers!! I remember many times growing up when I thought their marriage was headed for the rocks but they held it together for 59 years until mom passed on.
>
>My wife Judy has parents that also met in 1941, love at first site sort of thing, also married in 1941. Her parents same age as mine, and Judy and I are same age. Her parents are both still alive and well in Iowa and next month will celebrate their 65th anniversary. Our dads are both 91 and Judy's mom is 85.
>
>Judy and I met in high school in Cedar Rapids. Also love at first site, at least for me! We did not marry right away. I went off to college and Judy to missionary work. This year we will celebrate our 41st. I cannot say we never argued. There heve been times when days went by without speaking, each of us stubbornly waiting for an apology from the other. But never a thought of splitting up. We are trying our best to beat the record set by our parents.
>
>We have endured long military separations, a drug addicted child (all is well now for the past 14 years) and the burden of raising grandchildren for four years while our daughter got her head on straight. We have held on through good times and bad where we could not forsee how the next mortgage payment would be paid.
>
>I cannot say for certain how we do it. I wish I could write as eloquently as you, perhaps the words would be more explanatory. All I know is that I cannot imagine life without Judy at my side and I think she feels the same. We share a deep religious conviction and I'm sure that plays an important role.
>
>I wish I could be more help easing the pain I sense in your postings about your family. Thanks for giving me the opportunity early this morning to think about my fortunate situation.
>
>Ken
>
>>So let's say you're a romantic. And let's say a relationship has recently ended, painfully so for both. And let's say you know you should be sleeping but can't stop tossing and turning because you're fixated on the nature of love. Who winds up with who, and why? Why do we choose the people we do? How does it happen? Why the yesses, why the nos? I would hate to think it's just chance, although I suspect that's at least part of the answer.
>>
>>If anyone is bold enough to answer this question, what makes you fall in love and what makes you fall out of love?