>Millennia Year Application Software System
>
>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
> This memo is to announce the development of a new firm-wide software
> system. We are currently building a data center that will contain all
> firm data that is Year 2000 compliant. The program is referred to as
> the "Millennia Year Application Software System" (MYASS).
>
> Next Monday at 9:00 there will be a meeting in which I will show MYASS
> to everyone. We will continue to hold demonstrations throughout the
> month so that all employees will have an opportunity to get a good
> look at MYASS. As for the status of the implementation of the
> program, I have not addressed the networking aspects so currently only
> one person at a time can use MYASS. This restriction will be removed
> after MYASS expands.
>
> Several people are using the program already and have come to depend
> on it. Just this morning I walked into a subordinate's office and was
> not surprised to find that he had his nose buried in MYASS. I've
> noticed that some of the less technical personnel are somewhat afraid
> of MYASS. Just last week, when asked to enter some information into
> the program, I had a secretary say to me "I'm a little nervous, I've
> never put anything in MYASS before." I volunteered to help her through
> her first time and when we were through she admitted that it was
> relatively painless and she was actually looking forward to doing it
> again. She went so far as to say that after using SAP and Oracle, she
> was ready to kiss MYASS.
>
> I know there are concerns over the virus that was found in MYASS upon
> initial installation, but I am pleased to say the virus has been
> eliminated and we were able to save MYASS. In the future, however,
> protection will be required prior to entering MYASS. We planned this
> database to encompass all information associated with the business. So
> as you begin using the program, feel free to put anything you want
> into MYASS. As MYASS grows larger, we envision a time when it will be
> commonplace to walk by an office and see a manager hand a paper to an
> employee and say "Here, stick this in MYASS". This program has
> already demonstrated great benefit to the company during recent OSHA
> and EPA audits. After requesting certain historical data the agency
> representatives were amazed at how quickly we provided the
> information. When asked how the numbers could be retrieved so rapidly
> our Environmental Manager proudly stated "Simple, I just pulled them
> out of MYASS."
>
>--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Holy macro!!

ROFL!! That's some heavy late night humor..