>>>Maybe you will talk to your friends. I hope they express contrition in private at what they did. Lots of bad things happen in this world but if you admit what you did and say you're sorry you may be pleasantly surprised at the response. I know. I would love to see this story have a happy ending.
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>>I'm not in constant contact and haven't discussed this matter with them ever. My suspicion would be that people who feel strongly enough to do something like that are unlikely to see it differently in retrospect. A word said in anger can be a temporary slip. A letter seems much more calculated and less likely to have been done in the passion of a moment and more likely to be the result of someone feeling they *are* doing the right thing.
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>>That's the part I can't connect with.
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>I can't either. I have considered both of them friends for a long time (> 10 years) and am surprised that this happened.
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>Maybe you're right with the low expectation of remorse. As a recovering alcoholic, knowing more than I want to about good intentions and bad behavior, I do believe in the power of contrition. "I'm sorry" are two of the most powerful words in the language although among the hardest to say.

The only thing harder than saying your sorry is *being* sorry. My guess would be in this case that would be the sticking point.

I saw you say something about being off to work so I am glad that part of the recovery seems to be moving along. Best wishes for continued progress.