>Maybe I really am nuts. I am sure I have tried everyone's patience.
>
>When I am sober I don't feel nuts.
>
>When I go to AA meetings I don't feel nuts. When I go to meetings I feel it. But when they get going about the higher power they drive me away.
>
>I absolutely believe it when they say this is a progressive disease that can kill you.
>
>I am a terrible person when I drink. I hope that's only when.
>
>There is a woman I like in the group. She smiles a lot. She always comes in late. She speaks frankly but not theatrically I like everything about her. She is an alcoholic, like me, but she smiles and laughs easily. She is working hard at staying sober. I like her.
>
>Who cares what a drunk thinks? How worthless is that, even at Christmas?

ahhh. I've never understood the logic of those 12-step programs. Like how the heck is sitting around yakin about bad times and booze gonna help someone quit drinking? Doesn't seem like it's work too well to me - I'd think the idea would be to find OTHER things to think/talk about - but then again I'm obviously no expert at such things. And if you're an athiest it's even worse. But hey if it works for some people then I suppose it's a good thing. In the meantime there are other options like www.non12.com
Good luck with the battle Mike - I was wondering how it was going for ya lately......