>Someone is asked a yes/no question and they reply with the middle-class word for "yes" - "Absolutely"
>
>A cognisciento is asked to join in the discussion and begins his spiel with "I mean ...". He hasn't even said anything yet to qualify with an explanation!

Better: in Serbian newspeak, as I had a chance to observe a couple of years ago, it's now a habit to begin a sentence with "it means", which in turn means "therefore". I've seen guys wake up in the morning, mill about the kitchen and bathroom for twenty minutes in silence, and then one of them finally gets the first coffee in near-brain flow-by, and starts to speak... "therefore, we go to the beach after breakfast?". As if they were discussing the matter all night, and then finally the huge deliberation process is being crowned with this conclusion :).