>I have decided to force myself to learn SQL, therefore, the resultant headache from which I currently suffer. This shouldn't be this hard! I have two tables, one with 82 records and one with 80 records. The output I want is simple. I want the 2 records in table A that are not in table B.

I assume each table has a key, and thus you would need

SELECT SECONDTABLE.* ;
FROM SECONDTABLE ;
WHERE SECONDTABLE.KEY NOT IN ;
(SELECT FIRSTTABLE.KEY FROM FIRSTTABLE)