>Good luck. By the time you're dealing with teens and pre-teens, you generally learn to choose your battles. Hair length (or color) is rarely important enough to be one of them.
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>I think you're missing my point - the key is to guide them, even in the early years, that these are superficial things and shouldn't be what they're focusing on. One of the reasons kids want to do outlandish things with their appearance is because parent's DON'T teach them at an early age what they should be focusing on. Most kids who go out of their way to express themselves by their physical appearance, are often doing so because they haven't been taught the value of other qualities.

I agree with you that may be the case for a small number. However, the majority of cases I will disagree completely. I'm starting to either smell teenage rebellion or entirely different parenting choices in the future... :o)