Remember, falling asleep and snoring means instantaneously loosing any browny points that have been accumulated.

Actually, my wife is accustomed to me falling asleep during a movie.

It was what I did AFTERWARDS that still has her upset at me. We went out with two other families tonight, and they asked what I did for a living.

Here was reply #1:
"Have you ever driven through a construction site, and you see five guys standing around drinking coffee? I'm the guy who brings them coffee"

Well, after a good elbow from Gwen, here was reply #2...

"OK, OK, here's what I really do....you know those Walmart Greeters? I'm the one who makes their work schedule"

And finally, Gwen got angry and said, "you moron, will you tell them what you do?"

Well, I considered telling them the truth, but then a real zinger came to mind...

"OK, here's what I do...have you ever seen those Hair Club for Men commercials, where they show the 'Before' and 'After' pictures? They use my head for the 'After' pictures". Everyone laughed...well, except for my wife.