>>>>>In answer to all those of you who are wondering if I am drunk, yes, I am. But I fee better And now I will sleep a good sound sleep.
>>>>
>>>>Thanks for sharing.
>>>>
>>>>One is tempted to just ignore this and perhaps just look away out of politeness. But ...
>>>>
>>>>Some of the things I find particularly boring about drunks are delusions that their insights are of interest to others, their "illness" is somehow a heroic struggle - even if they choose to lose - and their seeming need to humiliate themselves in public in uncreative and repititious ways.
>>>>
>>>>It is a particularly unattractive form of narcissism.
>>>
>>>Addressing all of you who have responded to this, not just you. You are right, of course. After being banned over the summer I said several things were going to change when I returned. I was going to ignore a couple of people who have been giving me a hard time for years. I haven't. I was going to avoid getting into political and social debates. I haven't. I was not going to post while under the influence. I have. It's time for me to start sticking to all those vows.
>>>
>>>Not saying this to solicit any sympathy but alcoholism is just as ugly from the inside as it is to observers. I am basically all right, or at least well behaved, when sober. With alcohol that can go straight out the window. Inhibitions and civility disappear. When I read some of my drunken posts sober I am as repulsed as anyone else.
>>>
>>>It's not all gloom and doom. In fact I have been drinking very seldom. That's not as good as never but there have been many times it's been a lot worse than this. I have much to be thankful for and need to focus on those things. As far as the UT, if I can't be a cheerful presence what's the point?
>>>
>>>PS -- I gave up on "Our Kind of Traitor" last night. I was within 100 pages of the end and realized I really didn't care how it ended. With so many books waiting to be read there is no reason to finish something I am not enjoying.
>>
>>Just curious, are the girls with their mom for the holiday?
>
>They were with her and her family on Thanksgiving day. (I don't have any relatives in the area). Allie went up to spend yesterday with her mom in Wisconsin. She is coming back this morning and will be here for the rest of her break, what there is of it. I drive her back to school tomorrow. At her request I am making my (in)famous chili for dinner. We are mostly going to just hang out, with no more drama.

I suspected that may be the case. You know that is a "trigger" for you and I don't need to say that you could have planned in advance for it (but I did anyway). I'm glad to hear you have plans today. :o)