But does that include trimming your beard and flossing and brushing? My standard morning routine takes about a half hour or so, and that includes my asthma inhaler and rinsing and giving at least 2 of the cats noogies - in spite of the fact that you can't really give a cat a noogy because they like it.

I trim my beard 1-2 times a week.

Yup, includes the entire dental bit. Gargling with Scope, flossing, swishing with Listerine, and then brushing.

So...

1 minute for...well, you know....
7 minutes in the shower.
4 minutes to mix and apply all my hair products into one gravity-defying formula
2 minutes for the dental stuff
1 minute to get dressed.