>>>Removing scoring from sports is not a means of protecting kids from disenfranchisement. I was heavily involved with AYSO, American Youth Soccer Organization, the largest youth sports group in this country, so will reply. (Don't you hate those letters to the editor which begin, "As someone who...."? Subtext: I know more about this than you do). What AYSO teaches is that kids develop at fairly predictable stages, and tailors the program to those stages of development. Younger kids play on smaller fields with simpler rules, because that is what they can process. A U-8 field is exactly one quarter the size of a regulation soccer field. Some penalties are not enforced, namely offside. It's too much for them to keep track of. Sometimes with the younger kids it's a miracle when they keep track of who their teammates are and which way they are going. That's not making fun of them, just recognizing cognitive development. For all we know Einstein may have been slow to tie his shoes.
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>>>As their minds and bodies grow they move up to bigger fields. That was always a pleasure to observe. Those little kids who bundled up like survivalists on cold days in early spring or late autumn have gone on to play travel team, high school soccer, college soccer. One of them plays soccer for the University of Arkansas. I claim no credit for that, she arrived as an 8 year old already knowing a wealth about soccer from her dad, but it still gives me pleasure. We never know who that 8 year old might turn out to be.
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>>I agree. I've been coaching little league baseball since my son started T-Ball (he's 13 now). I've been amazed at the development of some of the kids over the years. Some kids that seemed destined for a couch their first couple of years are becoming shining star players. Others head the other way :(
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>>I've never seen any of them get crushed and disenfranchised if they lose a game or don't play well. All that means is there is room for advancement, and we work at it.
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>"I've never seen any of them get crushed and disenfranchised if they lose a game or don't play well. All that means is there is room for advancement, and we work at it."
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>I think it really depends on how the adults around them react to it. As an example, if you say something to the effect of "I'm sorry you lost, you did your best but sometimes that's just the way things work out." as opposed to "You LOST?? You SUCK!!" (massively paraphrased), you give the child (or children) the correct message of "You go out there, you do your best and that's what really matters."
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I have had to deal with a few parents like that. We have had ones that either blame the kid or blame the team (and me) if we don't do well. I don't mind too much if they blame me (I'll never get a major league contract to coach because I suck at it). I try as discreetly as I can to get in their face if they blame any of the kids (theirs or otherwise).

I did trade a kid to another team a few years back when his mother requested it (my team wasn't good enough). It was very rewarding to watch the extra effort my team made each time we played his new team afterward. That was the only team we shut out twice in a season :)


>So, yeah, I have an issue about the trend to not recognize kids for being the best they can be - for giving everyone a ribbon just for participating, etc. We're teaching them that all they have to do is show up and someone will give them something.