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>>And good on you for saying something. Too few people do. But until you've lived it for about 5 years, really you'll never understand it and it probably goes on around you all the time and you rarely notice it. Please do start paying more attention especially now that your daughter is getting school age - you're going to be surprised.
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>Oh, I pay attention.
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>Several years ago (I think it was fall of 2011) there was a big issue of a conference out in California that permitted (and made excuses for) something very sexist, something that made the small # of female attendees uncomfortable. One of the organizers tried to downplay it and I ripped the person on Twitter so badly that I got an email accusing me of harassing the conference.
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>One of the things that amazes me is how conferences now go to huge lengths to draft lengthy code of conduct rules for their events. It's sad to have to go to so much trouble, all because a few bad apples don't understand how to behave like adults. I've read at least five instances in the last few years where conferences had some kind of issue with racially or sexually offensive remarks/conduct (and I'm sure there have been more than five). There's zero excuse for it.

Unfortunately, in some parts of the tech community, it's not just a few bad apples, but very bad culture. IME, the VFP community is pretty amazing in the treatment of women as equal partners. I'm sure that's partly because there have been visible female leaders in the community pretty much from day 1. When I read about some of what women in other tech communities go through on a regular basis, I'm very grateful that I landed in this community.

Tamar