>>>So got a new laptop with windows 10 .
>>>
>>>No problems but my wife doesn't like wireless.
>>>So I had wireless turned on while she was out and I was setting it up.
>>>
>>>Now she's back in so I've turned off my wireless on the router.
>>>
>>>pop the ethernet cable in the new laptop and it doesn't fff___ing work.
>>>
>>>Resolveable I'm sure but it seems a very simple thing to have working out of the box.
>>>
>>>Time for Craig to tell me its an improved feature.
>>
>>Did you switch the laptop to airplane mode?
>>
>>Have you run through the network troubleshooters? They're starting to get somewhat useful.
>
>Yes wireless is off.
>
>I ran the Windows network diagnostic and its saying Ethernet doesn't have a valid IP configuration.

On most computers (laptop or desktop) it's possible to enable or disable a built-in Ethernet port in the BIOS. Can you go into your BIOS setup (press the correct key during boot) and check? Depending on the BIOS it's probably under a section named "Integrated Peripherals" or something like that.

You can also check that it's present in Device Manager. You should see at least 2 physical network adapters: one for wireless, one for wired. If there isn't a wired adapter you may need to enable it in the BIOS.

To rule out a bad cable, can you try to connect with the same cable that you use for your old laptop?

Do you know if the old laptop uses a static IP address, or if it gets one automatically via DHCP?