>>>
>>>The problem here is confusing someone's orientation and choice of partner, versus "gender identification"
>>
>>Curious. Do you know anyone who is trans?
>>
>
>I live in/near a big city. And you're asking me that question??? :)
>
>The answer is yes.

I mean really know, not just encounter in the course of daily life. You seem to be suggesting that being trans is nonsense, or at least, that trans people shouldn't be allowed to live as the gender they feel they are. That's why I asked.

Here in the VFP community, we have two people born as men who has transitioned to women. I don't think I've ever met Martina Jindrova (though might have at the Prague conference years ago), but I knew Jim Booth for years and years before he became Janis, and cannot imagine that was a process he/she (hard to figure which is the right pronoun for this particular statement) undertook lightly.

One of the kids who hung out in my house in high school started transitioning in college. I was surprised, but a conversation with another mom from the group who'd known him even longer made it clear this kid had been burying these feelings for more than a decade.

Tamar