>AV software must be an interesting market - this sort of software works best if it doesn't work. I mean, if it has no reason to do any work, and you're safe from viruses (viri?). Reminds me of an old joke about a man who was spilling some liquid from a running train, and another passenger asked what he was doing. "This is a special dum-dum tonic against the elephants" "But there are no elephants!" "Ah, you see - it works".

I have heard an American version of this as well. The man is standing is Times Square with a banana is his ear.