>Ok, here's one.. (and nit at all directed at anyone)

Or....

Its a thankless job but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the molecular level I'm quite busy.
No, my powers can only be used for good.
Thank you, we're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public
You are validating my inherint mistrust of strangers
Ahhh... the screw-up fairy has come to visit us again
I like you, you remind me of when I was young and stupid
I will always cherish the intial misconceptions I had of you
I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me