>Where might I find code or a utility that a VFP application can request who has a particular table open and allow the application to "kill" the file association or connection?

The operating system of the machine that shares the file can be asked regarding that; remote termination of a connection, esecially of an active data table, is dangerous, since it may not write pending updates to the disk that reside buffered on the workstation. There are entries in the FAQ that show how this can be done.