Like President Clinton handing out pardons to the likes of Dan Rostenkowski, I am handing out my own:

To Doug Dodge:
A pardon for being a bible-thumping maniac.

To John Harvey:
A pardon for being a gun totting, bambi killing, cheap beer drinkin' redneck.

To Mike Helland:
A pardon for being younger than I am.

To Della Martin:
A pardon for her past association with Duke University.

To John Koziol:
A pardon for calling me a partisan shrill.

To John V Petersen or Peterson (I can never keep i right):
A pardon for... ah, you know what I mean.

< vbg >

Holiday wishes to all... VFP and the UT would be no fun without you.