I have a one to many relation set on a from and two grids displaying the data..

I have the relation working great(click on on grid - displays many on the other), but I'm have great difficulties getting the many grid to order by a index / or allow the changing of an index to order by a different field. I have had no difficulties doing this with only the many data alone, but once the relation is set up all data in the many grid disapears. I have tried a dizzing number of order/childorder properties as well set index to in code. I'm puzzled and starting to wonder if it is even possible. Any advice / help would be geatly appriciated. Thanks