Politically Correct Christmas Greetings

Please accept with no obligation, expressed or implied, my best wishes for
an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress,
non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday,
practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion
of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the
religious / secular persuasions and / or traditions of others, or their
choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all...

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A fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated
recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2002, but
not without due respect for the calendars of choice of others and without
regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith,
or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms. This greeting is
subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no
alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to
actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void
where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application
of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a
subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited
to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole
discretion of the wisher.