>>http://www.despair.com/viewall.html
>>
>>I like:
>>
>>CustomerCare - If we really care for the customer we'd send them somewhere better.
>
>I ordered a calendar from them a few months ago. I keep it at the office. The month of February had a similar sentiment. It was:
>
>Apathy - If we don't take care of the customer, maybe they'll stop bugging us.
>
>~~Bonnie

A colleague of mine with a military background sent me a few with a similar idea but a military twist. I liked;

Attitude - It takes 43 muscles to frown, 17 to smile, but only 3 for proper trigger squeeze.

Firepower - If its not working, you're not using enough.

Violence - It only works if you use it.