Hillbilly Computer Jargon:

Backup - What you do when you run across a skunk in the woods

Bit - A wager as in, "I bit you can't spit that watermelon seed across the porch longways."

Byte - Whut them dang flys do

Bug - The reason you give for calling in sick

Cache - Needed when you run out of food stamps

Chip - Pasture muffins that you try not to step in

Crash - When you go to Junior's party uninvited

Digital control - What yore fingers do on the TV remote

Diskette - Female disco dancer

Download - Gettin' the farwood offn the pickup

Enter - Northern 'fer c'mon in y'all

Floppy - When you run out of Polygrip

Floppydisk - Whatcha git from tryin' to carry to much farwood

Hacker - Uncle Leroy after 32 years of smoking

Hard drive - Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer

Internet - Where cafeteria workers put their hair

Keyboard - Place to hang your truck keys

Laptop - Whur the kitty sleeps

LAN - To borrow as in, "Hey Bart! LAN me yore truck."

Log on - Making the wood stove hotter

Log off - Don't add no more wood

Mac - Big Bubba's favorite fast food

Mainframe - Holds up the barn ruf

Megahertz - When yer not keerful gettin' that farwood downloaded

Microchip - Whut's left in the munchie bag

Modem - How you got rid of your dandelions

Mouse Pad - Where Mickey and Minnie live

Network - How to get yer bait for fishin

Online - Where you hang your clothes to dry

Packet - What you do to a suitcase before a trip

Prompt - Whut th mail ain't in the winter taim

Reboot - What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff

Screen - Whut to shut when it's black fly season

Software - Them dang plastik forks and knives

Superconductor - Amtrak's Employee of the year

Terminal - Time to call the undertaker

Windows - Place in the truck to hang your gun