>>>>What in tarnation you on about, boy!?
>>>
>>>Me? Ya'll are the ones who appear to be under the influence!<g>
>>
>>But I've never heard that load of doggerel, even deep in my cups :-)
>
>Well, then here's the whole shebang -
>
>The Scotsman
>
>Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar on evening fair
>And one could tell by how we walked that he drunk more than his share
>He fumbled round until he could no longer keep his feet
>Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
>Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
>He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
>
>About that time two young and lovely girls just happend by
>And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
>See yon sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built
>I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
>Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
>I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
>
>They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
>Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
>And there behold, for them to see, beneath his Scottish skirt
>Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
>Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
>Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
>
>They marveled for a moment, then one said we must be gone
>Let's leave a present for our friend, before we move along
>As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
>Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
>Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
>Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
>
>Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards a tree
>Behind a bush, he lift his kilt and gawks at what he sees
>And in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes.
>O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
>Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
>O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize

Nice one! :-) I've never heard of that song.