>>I feel your pain. 'Beaird' is historically the correct way to spell the name and it has a distinct English, Irish and Scots branch. How the name got spelled over here depended on if your first family member hit Ellis Island on the way in (mine was 1780-something, so no) and how literate the person was taking your name down - or how literate you were to be able to spell it for them. Hence 'Beaird', 'Beard', 'Baird'.
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>>It's pronounced, at least in our family, as 'beard'. One nice thing though, when telemarketers call it sounds something like "Hello, is Mrs Beeyeard there?". I have absolutely no problem saying "Nope, no one with that name here.".
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>>And forget trying to explain how to spell it. I just go with 'Yeah, 3 vowels together.' because people want to spell it "Bearid".
>
>I can commiserate with your weaird situation... been there, heard it all. Just try to imagine how they pronounced our last name, then multiply your imaginary number of versions by at least three :).

I might be able to get it the first time. At least I would like to think so. :)

By the way I just received an eMail from my Polish cousin a few minutes ago. She just retired as a programmer for the Bank of America. The Polish side of my family consists of people that love life and enjoy it too! I must admit that I am lost when they speak Polish. :)