>I have avoided such posts, mostly due to being sober most of the time. There have been far more sober days thank drinking ones. The past two weeks I fell back into the abyss. One of the mystifying things is I never know what triggers it.

I guess I'll never understand the mindset of a drinker or an addict in general. I love a good drink or two, but somewhere around the third one something kicks in and I stretch it for over an hour. I have reached my plateau of feeling good, and I (instinctively or through experience, no difference now) feel that more won't make it better, may make it worse. So I don't. Kind of being in a lucid dream, I still keep my will over events, and choose what I will allow to happen and what not. Even when drinking in a perfectly safe environment, i.e. at home, where I don't have to worry about getting home, I still don't let go.

And then there are days when the drink just doesn't work. Had a few of those during the last years, various weddings etc, when we start around lunch and take it until late in the evening - just doesn't hit me at all, at least none of the known symptoms appear (speaking in a different manner, feeling high, bits of dizziness at times, attempting to sing).

But when it works, I don't take the fourth until at least an hour after the third, and even that's less frequent than once a year. I guess I'm a cheap date... or is it that my guts give up faster than my head.

Of course, this is of no use to you. If you had that kind of mental defense to stop on time, we wouldn't have this thread. So I guess it'll be another cold turkey for you.