>>>I bought some used paint the other day...
>>>
>>>>That was funny, but Steven Wright is the best in my book!
>>
>>That's nothing, I came home last night and stuck my car keys in the back door. My house started, so I drove it around!
>
>I was speeding, and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "right here, officer". Later, I parked it on the freeway, got out, and yelled at all the cars, "Get out of my driveway!"

Oh yeah, well I've got a splitting headache - I've been trying to take a closeup picture of the horizon all day!